Unrequited Love SebastianXCiel
by Blaze the Warrior
Summary: *Sequel to Forbidden Love* It's been officially two years since Sebastian's death on Ciel's birthday. Now sixteen and alone, the young Earl's life takes a dramatic change as a mysterious yet familiar figure appears out of the blue. Are these just fragments of a mere memory from the past? Or is there a truth to be uncovered in what seems to be an eternal nightmare?
1. The Earl, Depressed

**A/N: This is the sequel to Forbidden Love, my other SebastianXCiel fanfic. If you haven't read it, then don't read this. I hope you enjoy, and sorry for any disappointments! And btw, I know this is short for a first chapter, but...I tried...and hopefully it'll get better. Also: There /may/ be smut, or torture. So that's why it's rated M.**

* * *

Ciel Phantomhive opened his drained, blue eyes as he woke up from his sleep. Slowly, he sat up and rubbed his eyes using the back of his hands to get rid of the exhaustion held within them. The curtains were pushed open; allowing sunlight to shine into the darkened room. It seemed to be a beautiful outside; Ciel had thought so at the least. He sighed, getting up from his bed and walking over to the window. Using most of his strength, he freed the latch and opened the window wide; a fresh breeze greeting him almost instantly. Birds were chirping outside of the manor. A beautiful sound they made, and the young Lord enjoyed it. But as his clear, blue eyes stared out the window, depression overcame him and he closed his eyes tightly shut.

Suddenly someone knocked at the door. A second after that the door opened and in came his butler. The man gazed at Ciel with a sympathetic look. Slowly, the Earl looked over his shoulder, blinking his eyes open at his butler; Oliver James. Normally, it was a butler's job to wake up their Master's, but Ciel had been waking up on his own instead. He didn't desire to have anyone wake him up anymore. In his own thoughts, he didn't want to wake up and live in this reality any longer. The world meant nothing to him; including every single being in this world. Ciel just didn't want to live in this world at all.

"Master, allow me to dress you—"

"Hurry up," murmured Ciel quietly; interrupting his butler as he looked back out the window. "Fetch me my clothes and return immediately. There is no time to waste."

"Yes, Master." James bowed and left the room immediately; obeying the order given.

Once again, Ciel Phantomhive was left all alone in his bedroom, staring out the window for countless minutes; just thinking. What was he thinking about exactly? His regretful past. He never felt so empty...so alone…not until years ago. It was summer, and Ciel was currently sixteen, soon to be seventeen within a few more months. But none of that mattered to him. Not since the death of his love—and butler—Sebastian Michaelis.

Tears formed in his eyes in memory of the Demon who died on his birthday. The fool died protecting Ciel, yet in exchange his life was taken away by the Undertaker. And the Undertaker's riddle still never left his mind; he had memorized it by heart, though he wasn't sure of what he meant still. It frustrated him to try thinking about it. Especially since it was the Undertaker who took the Demon's life away; never to return.

The young Earl hadn't even seen the grim reaper since that day on his birthday. Nor had he seen Grell Sutcliff; the red-haired reaper. The tears that formed in Ciel's eyes began dripping down his cheeks and onto the window ledge as he gazed outside; remembering everything so clearly. It killed him deep inside to hear his butler speak his last words. Those words were lies, though; Ciel did love Sebastian. More than anything and anyone in the world. But there was no proof of that since he spilled lies himself about it.

If only he had been honest. Now Ciel Phantomhive regretted that the most. He missed Sebastian Michaelis dearly, and every day, for the two years he was dead for, Ciel had cried himself to sleep. There wasn't a day when he didn't think about the butler. Two whole years without his love.  
Finally, Oliver James returned with Ciel's clothing. Standing up, Ciel stumbled slightly; falling into the arms of Oliver. The older man sighed.

"Will you be alright, Master?"

"Don't question me," muttered Ciel as he shoved him away; glancing away.

Without any more objections, the butler dressed Ciel for the day that would change his life extraordinarily.


	2. The Earl, Forever Regretful

Ciel had predicted the weather correctly; it was a beautiful day. The warm sun heated up his cold body from the night and made him appear lively. As he strode up the stairs of the Middleford Manor, he glanced at his current surroundings. The butler behind him slowed his pace as he looked around the familiar place. On this day, Ciel was visiting his fiancé to discuss their marriage that was coming up in no less than three years. Once they reached the top of the steps, James knocked lightly twice on the Middleford Estate door; which was immediately answered by Paula. Paula's eyes lit up when she opened the door and she bowed with a smile across her face.

"Lord Ciel! It's a pleasure to have you here today! My Lady will surely be happy to see you here, hold on," exclaimed Paula as she turned and ran back inside the manor, calling for her Mistress. "My Lady! The Earl has arrived!"

Several seconds later his fiance ran to the door and soared into his arms; squealing with joy. "Ciel! I'm so glad you're here!"

Ciel glanced away, sighing, "It's about our wedding arrangements; I couldn't avoid it. But it is nice to see you again, Elizabeth."

"Elizabeth!" came his Aunt's stern scolding. "That is not how a proper lady treats her betrothed."

The young girl pulled away immediately; bowing to him. "Sorry mother. I forgot," she mumbled quietly, lowering her gaze.

Francis strode out of the Estate to stand beside Elizabeth. Ciel looked up at his Aunt and dipped his head in greeting.

"Hello Aunt Francis; it's been a while since we last saw each other—"

"Hmph. At least you're on time," Francis nodded and smiled at him. "I've missed you the same, Ciel. But I must say…you're starting to resemble your father more and more as time passes by, though, you will always have your mother's eyes."

"I'm starting to get that quite a lot now," Ciel agreed, faking a small laugh.

His eyes darted back and forth from Elizabeth and her beautiful mother. Even after a few years, Elizabeth's growth has made her resemble her mother slightly. Both were stunningly beautiful, which didn't surprise Ciel at all. What did surprise him was how Francis kept her youth intact. Elizabeth now had long, beautiful, blond hair that still curled like before, but much less. Her eyes still always lit up with excitement constantly, but her body features had changed remarkably. Ciel still had his childish features, though, as he was only sixteen. But there was a slight change to make him similar to his father. Either way; Ciel was the same boy he was in the past with nothing changed.

"Where will we discuss this at-?" began Ciel before being interrupted by his Aunt again.

"We were going to take a walk first. It's about time you spent some decent time with us since you've been locked up inside your manor all the time." Francis glanced at him for approval, since he was just about old enough to make his own decisions.

A fake smile formed across his face and he nodded in agreement. "Sounds like a good idea to me."

Why was he faking these smiles? Perhaps it was because he wanted to look like he was having a fine time with the family? Maybe it was to impress his Aunt and prove he was the right one for her daughter? No. Sadly, none of those were the reasons for his smile. He was smiling because he didn't want to concern them any longer. After all, it was Francis and Elizabeth who took care of Ciel after the butler's death. They're the ones who found him James, and they're the ones who had stood by his side until he felt like his old self. But they should have realized by now he would never be the same.  
Elizabeth did her very best to make him smile ever since the butlers' death. He would fake a smile for her, but deep down inside it ached; knowing what he said could never be taken back. The butler was gone forever; and that meant an eternity. An eternity is never ending. Never again would Ciel love; nor would he ever smile again.

* * *

Ciel strode beside Elizabeth as they headed their way back to the Middleford Manor; ahead of her mother and his butler. Together they were discussing many things; mainly things about the wedding. Ciel wasn't eager, unlike Elizabeth who couldn't wait for the day. She was too excited. As they walked beside each other, a small chuckle left his mouth as he remembered he was finally taller than her. By an inch, rather. Now Elizabeth was able to wear high heeled shoes that she couldn't before. Elizabeth smiled brightly at him and he smiled back.  
"Um, Ciel..?"

"What is it, Lizzie?"

"Do you…" she began, pausing.

"Do I what?" he pressed, raising an eyebrow. "Get on with it."

"Do you miss Sebastian?" she blurted out.

The young boy stared at her with widened blue eyes; clearly stunned by her question. He slowed his pace to a stop and he stared at her as a moment of silence came between the two. After a moment, he blinked and dipped his head.

"Why would you ask that?" he whispered quietly.

"I-I'm sorry C-Ciel," she sobbed as tears formed in her eyes; obviously upset that she hurt him by asking such a silly question.

He sighed and pulled out a handkerchief from his pocket; wiping the tears from her eyes. "You've asked such a silly question, honestly."

Her clear green eyes gazed at him as he began walking again. "C-Ciel-?"

"Of course I'm going to miss him for a long while," said Ciel, suddenly as he stopped walking; glancing up at the blue sky. "He was the one who saved me… Who protected me… He did everything for me…" Elizabeth watched him as he turned to face her with determined blue eyes. "But there are more important things than those who are gone. I'm not going to forget his death so easily, but I'm going to move on and continue with my life. It pains me to remember him, but I must also realize that he saved me. He knew this would happen sooner or later; not everything's a happy ending. We don't live in a fairytale. We live in this reality. And once someone's time is up, they're not given a second chance. So no matter what, we need to continue onwards; no matter how lonely or miserable this path may be."

He spotted Francis and James watching and listening in a distance from the corner of his eyes. Francis smiled at him and held her hands together; obviously proud of his speech. Elizabeth on the other hand was being admirable about it. But as he turned his head slightly, his eyes narrowed; spotting a figure in the dark forest surrounding the path they took. The dark figure stood deep within the trees. A tall and slim man? His eyes widened a bit, almost recognizing this familiar figure. But before he could say a thing, the figure ran off in a different direction; gone from Ciel's sight.

His heart skipped a beat the moment he spotted the figure. At first glance, he knew that man in the woods was familiar; as Ciel instantly recognized him. But who was he? Running a hand through his hair, Ciel stared into the forest with longing, deep, blue eyes. He wanted to call to that man before he ran off. Why was he so familiar? Why was his heart skipping a beat at the thought of that man? Who was he? And why did Ciel feel memories of love rush through his mind once he saw the figure in the woods? Who was this familiar man?


	3. The Earl, Remembering the Past

Back at the manor, Ciel sat at his desk in his study; gazing at the door in front of his eyes. All he could think about was the man in the woods. The mysterious man that caught his eye. Ciel placed a hand over his right eye, closing them as he remembered having the contract and eye patch over that eye. But ever since the death of Sebastian, it slowly faded away until it vanished completely. Not a single trace of it within his eye. No one really questioned him about his eye months later; he lied and told them it had finally healed completely. Elizabeth was of course more than happy to hear about that.

Elizabeth Middleford. She stood by his side throughout the whole time, even if he didn't want her to. He didn't love her nor did he desire to be with her any longer. He preferred Sebastian over everyone and everything. If he could—just to see the butler one last time—he would take his own life. He didn't care to live in a world full of pain any longer. It disgusted him, frankly. Ciel Phanromhive wanted to live no more; those were his exact thoughts days, hell, years ago. But after seeing that mysterious figure in the woods earlier that day, he didn't want to leave just yet. Instead, he wanted to keep moving forward; hoping to see that figure again.

Why? Why was it important for him to have one last glimpse?

It was because that figure in the woods reminded him of someone very special in his heart. If he could have a closer look, that would be all he wanted. Ciel didn't believe in any God, but for once in his entire life, he had hoped and prayed to some God, that the man would return again. Pitiful, yes, but Ciel has never been so desperate in his life. Could it really be him? The one who never left his mind ever since that tragic day?

His thoughts scattered as someone knocked lightly on the door of his study. "Come in."

"Master?" asked Oliver as he opened the door, glancing inside the dark room. "What are you doing still awake? Shouldn't you be asleep?"

"I will be asleep soon. I was just thinking about something," replied Ciel tediously.

"And are you positive you don't want anything to eat? No supper—"

"James, I said I wasn't hungry six times already!" snapped Ciel, narrowing his eyes. "Now leave me alone. I'll put myself to sleep."

"As you wish, Master." Oliver bowed and left the room; leaving Ciel all alone in the dark.

Ciel released a small sigh as he rubbed his forehead. "That idiot… Making me snap like that with his irritating questions…"

Pain ached inside him as he remembered the butler again. Ciel would snap at him so often for the silliest things; even when he gave him affection. Why…? Why couldn't Ciel have accepted his feelings for the butler instead of lying and letting him leave him alone?

_Sebastian, you…you idiot! I can't believe you died on me… I-I did love you…so bloody much… Why couldn't you see through my lies? You promised me to never leave my side! Why did you suddenly? What did you want from me? Love? Affection? Did you want all this from me? For me to prove my love? W-why didn't you tell me…? I didn't think it had mattered any!  
_

Regret filled inside him as he continued with his adverse thoughts. But the butler didn't want to live any longer if it meant Ciel didn't love him in return. It was understandable, actually. Who would want to stay by someone's side if they didn't receive love in return? It would be an unrequited love. Yes, the love Ciel was feeling now. So alone in the world without the perfect butler. What was so hard about saying three simple words: I love you.

The bloody grim reapers were never seen again; not the Undertaker or Grell Sutcliffe. Why did they kill him? What was the whole point? Was it because of their damn rivalry against each other? Was that it? Ciel ran a hand through his hair, remembering the day so precisely and clearly. The death of his butler had shocked everyone. No one expected him to pass away. He remembered it as if it were yesterday:

_ Ciel grabbed onto his hand immediately; tears dripping from his eyes and onto the butlers pale and colorless face. He gripped onto his hand tightly, crying out into the world as pain ached everywhere inside his body; specifically his damaged heart.  
_

_"You damn fool!" he cried, trying to hold back anymore tears, though it was impossible. "How dare you leave m-me?"  
_

_Blood surrounded the butlers' body and soaked the wet grass from the rain that evening. Hatred rushed through his veins as he despised the two grim reapers that killed Sebastian. But he couldn't do anything. He just sat there and cried out, hoping it was all a nightmare like the one he had earlier in the year. But no matter how much he wanted it to be all a nightmare, it was reality; and nothing would be the same. He lost the butler, but he wouldn't accept it. No, he couldn't believe Sebastian left him. He refused to believe he was gone forever.  
_

_"Young Master!" called several voices from behind.  
_

_Ciel glanced over his shoulder with red, puffy eyes at the three figures running towards him; recognizing them as Bard, Mey-Rin and Finnian. Their eyes were wide with concern until they stopped a few feet away; finally spotting the lifeless butler and crying Earl. Their eyes widened even more with shock and pain as they stared at the butler surrounded by a bloody puddle.  
_

_"M-Mister Sebastian…" whispered Finnian, unable to process what was happening; just like everyone else. Bard immediately knelt beside him and pressed two fingers against his neck; searching for some kind of pulse. But there was none at all.  
_

_"Mey-Rin, take the young Master home," Bard ordered.  
_

_The maid bowed and took Ciel's arm; pulling him up to his feet and holding him close. "Let's go, Master—"  
_

_"What in the b-bloody hell are you doing?" cried Ciel in a demanding voice, slapping her hands off him and trying to run back to Sebastian. "U-unhand me!"  
_

_Finnian ran in front of Ciel and stopped him, holding him back away from the butler who laid on the bloody ground. "Young Master, please!"  
_

_"D-don't touch me!" snapped Ciel, more tears spilling from his face. "S-Sebastian!"  
_

_Bard closed the butler's eyes, lowering his head in grief. "He's dead, Master. He's gone from this world; unable to return."  
_

_Ciel stared at Sebastian with red eyes, closing them in pain and collapsing onto his knees. He covered his face as he cried into his hands, wishing he—too—had left the world alongside the Demon. Unfortunately, he was left alive and alone. Not to mention hurt and broken. _

"Damn…" whispered Ciel, standing up and leaving his study. He closed the door and headed down the hall to his bedroom, opening the door there and walking over to his bed. He laid on the bed; feeling more lonely than ever before. On this bed Sebastian slept with Ciel. For the last time since his death. Now Ciel slept alone; found to be hugging a pillow closely to him as he wished for Sebastian's return to the Human Realm.

Where was he now? He died as a Demon from a grim reaper's scythe; he couldn't just fade away forever. He must have gone somewhere. Hopefully. And if he had, he hoped Sebastian was happier. Yes, that's what he hoped for.

"I love you, Sebastian Michaelis," whispered Ciel before closing his eyes and falling into a deep sleep.


End file.
